the Lord is my shepherd.
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CHRISTIAN!
> xueting
> 14`15
> 120293
> twofive07`threefive08
> xueting3@hotmail.com
yes
its seriously a super hard moment for me now .
its a torture .
im goin all out to 4get bout it .
im goin all out to hide my emotions .
tryin my best to play a strong front in front of the ppl arnd me .
bt it doesn seem to work at all .
it seems lyk we hv been to every part of spore .
now dat im tryin to go out to kip myself occupied .
everywhere i go reminds me of eu .
so mani things at home reminds me of eu .
it seems lyk i hv no where to go .
no where where i could let go of everything .
i wonder y ppl can let it go so easily bt i cant .
y me .
i noe it must hv been such a joke to c how weak i am .
how useless n lousy i m .
i understand dere r so mani ppl arnd me who care for me .
bt ur comfort only cool me at dat moment .
i tried really hard bt i cant get hold of myself .
i tried really hard 2 nt disappoint eu ol . bt i cant .
eu all wil nvr noe how tortured i m to kip a smile .
i tried nt to let anione find out . i really tried .
unexpectedly gd results doesn seem to cheer me up at al .
sometimes i really hope i nvr hv once experience the joy n happiness of love .
i hope i m stil a kid .
bcuz wen eu experience n get all dat pleasure .
eu wil nvr b able to live without it animore .
perhaps it isn a gd thing dat ur relationship is owaes gg out so well .
bcuz wen eu suddenly lose it all .
eu wil hv no idea wad to do next .
it seems lyk eu hv no direction in life .
its nt easy to get use to the extreme change .
its not easy at all .
now dat eu hv the trouble of tryin to kip urself occupied to nt remind eu of the past .
bt at the same tym eu hv no mood to do ani other thing .
food bcums an insignificant part of my life .
in fact . it seems lyk a torture every meal time .
ppl hus nt close to me may think im tough .
in fact . i used to . bt nt animore .
i dunno hu i m animore .
God you wil hv to pull me out of diz torture real soon .
at the rate im goin . i wonder how long i wil b able to hang on .
im nt tryin to gain empathy frm anione .
for diz is nt my style .
nor m i tryin to impy anithing .
i just nid a channel in which i can sae al out .
hopin it wil make me feel beta .
bt i doubt .
ha . wad a joke .
4:37 PM
(SALVATION)